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Youtube Closed Captioning Fail

Posted by Dan Rickmers On March - 4 - 2010

Youtube has this new feature called “closed captioning,” which is supposed to automatically translate voice to text for the deaf or something dumb like that. What it actually does is mistranslate everything with often hilarious results. So I transcribed this week’s episode of Trailer Trash, the one on the new Robert Pattinson movie, Remember Me. It’s pretty damn funny if you ask me. Probably funnier than the video itself, which is about how a gay man named Robert Hansen (code for Robert Pattinson) is plotting some sort of terrorist attack according to this transcript. Yikes.

Dammit youtube, is it THAT obvious?

Welcome to this week’s episode of “Compel the Concentrated Trash.” I didn’t rehearse, and is it EVER going to be reviewing Remember Be? So sick! That Robert, as an individual, you have stood up from her hands. True. Remember May, let’s say, “well, I don’t know five watch it.” It’s terrible terrible movie, but it IS possible. Alright, the drop said, “in New York City during the Summer of 2001.” What? Either Paterson [Pattinson], of then, these young men beat. Alley, the check from laws, through Princeton the- MMMMMM.

There’s your health, you, and the tragedy. The soonest circumstances that brought them together red irritable halt. What’s the probability is this? Robert Hansen. [Pattinson]

Was it just THAT huge, Pattinson?

“You can’t!”
“Foreign Minister, it simple.”
“That’s…It was just huge!”

He was.
That’s right Barbara, most part because it does whatever the party! Lots of coal. Yeah.

Then he alley, the only one who could sell hardened hearts, but the sensitivity and cases in the sociology of the readers. Can be? No.

That’s not…shot is totally unfounded view of life! I mean that’s why I don’t [verb] the east Asian studies major with a modern country…and there are signs of morality. Rubber bands and they THINK he’d be a reality. Is. But that’s it from Office. Pretty really is that too.

“What is this is?! Don’t talk about society.”

I second that, you pretentious ass.

She’s a free will that she can hear you that he or she wants to! The two “firecrackers,” don’t they? Central. Sexual.

“The yes.”
“Standing at the things: you.”

But then, something wonderful! They don’t realize is that Jim Crow laws! So across the city…alright. You know.

Seriously? Jim Crow laws?

But this isn’t the case! What do you think that this might be? Could it be, that’s different? I think…that he’s [Robert Pattinson] out [of the closet]!

“Steve.”

Maybe. Could it be, the up? They wouldn’t do that. This is exploitative. Wait a minute…let’s take a look at the post. But the issue here, we got a New York City skyline attack, so that money, “the stuff…”

STOP JUDGING ME.

I don’t know. Let’s take a look at the…uh, the Fed may come as a result of us, okay? But as usual, a little bit more “leading.” I’ll tell you what, let’s look at the polls Friday.

That does seem to be conclusive. My theory is that Robert Hansen was the murder of THE WHOLE TIME. Yeah, and what better way to move it forward for humanity kids! And still months its rules to avoid a statistical there. Wasn’t until that time he does. Other the lifeblood of the authors with some friends! I don’t really know what that means, but let me say this: it.

Use the buddy system when sucking "the lifeblood of the authors."

So like…[you] probably won’t watch. I don’t know where to determine book, I also would tell you guys a and…so this is leading…SUFFER in this whole case. A lot of age.

Following a quitter cleared up calls; last day on Earth matters. So you feel, though that followed the frankly seventy-two in order of labor people. Maybe some of the look for. Very little, but totally right. About it. Whatever. Watch. Alright?

Wasn’t that wonderful? I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Here’s a link back to the original post, and here’s the video which you can watch on your very own!

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HOHOHO Gorilla Sex

Posted by Dan Rickmers On December - 25 - 2009

Merry Christmas everyone, my gift to you is this video of Gorillas fucking to Mika. You may not have asked for it, but I knew it’s what you really wanted instead of that Wii Fit. SEASONS PLEASINGS.

<3

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The Vegetarian’s Wiener

Posted by Dan Rickmers On December - 2 - 2009
These wienerz are plump enough to fit your bun just right.

These wienerz are plump enough to fit your bun just right.

Okay, this week it’s a video about hot dogs and angry hobos, and next week it’s the worst movies of the DECADE. Exciting times all around, if you ask me. This video is a cute little romantic comedy. Making it was pretty cool, because approximately half of the people who were involved in making in it asked me not to mention their real names, to avoid people finding it on Google in relation to them. Is there really any higher form of praise? I think not. So enjoy what’s sure to be strange and disturbing, and don’t watch it if you’re offended by the many uses of wienerz or Oscar Meyer commercials. I know that last thought probably struck fear into some of your hearts, so you might as well just watch it.

Aww, wasn’t that neat? I like the part where the guy in the song spells out the word love, because I also like to spell. If you were disturbed by that at all, just keep in mind it’s not that much different than a picnic. It’s just like a hot dog grill at a big, messy picnic……..yeah okay maybe it is a little weird.

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Your Turn (To Die)

Posted by Dan Rickmers On November - 4 - 2009


Picture 14It’s that time again! Time for me to slack off on giving you a five-minute video of me making jokes about movies and instead give you a five-minute video I made about people dying! It’s okay though, because this time I included the song “You’re The Inspiration” by Chicago, so you KNOW it’s good. Another way you know it’s good is because youtube has officially banned this video from Germany. Badass? Don’t ask me why, because they weren’t very clear on that point. They just sent me an email that read “Dude, we seriously can’t play this in Germany. THINK OF THE CONSEQUENCES!” Speculate.

Did you “luh dat shiz” or what? Personally, I’d tolerate that filum two or maybe even three times!

Hugz,
Daniel

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Video Response to My Own Video

Posted by Dan Rickmers On October - 21 - 2009


Aw MAN does Filmfail.com make me mad! That stupid Dan Rickmers and his “movie” “reviews”! Hey brah, you don’t even give those movies a chance! If you don’t know what I’m so MAD about, then look at the God-awful review of Saw 6 he did last week on Filmfail.com: http://www.filmfail.com/all/saw6/

Do you think you could post this video I made about how you suck so everyone else can watch it and have lulz at you? Kthx.

Glad I got that angeriness out of my system. See you next week, and SCREW that Dan Rickmers, lols!

Sincerely,
Dan Rickmers

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About Me

O hai! Im Dan Rickmers, the main editor for Filmfail.com, and the guy in all those videos. Im a Junior in NYUs undergraduate Cinema Studies program, and I love making fun of movies. Does that make me an asshole? Totally, but thats why you came here, isnt it?

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