Shirtless Men Provide Cinematic Quality
You have entered the Twilight Zone. Beyond this world, sucky movies are shown. Speaking of Rush songs, I think I may have subconsciously quoted some of their lyrics in this review. So, the people I know who are Twilight fans even have to clarify that they “know it’s bad,” but like it anyway. Therefore, I feel obligated to ignore this fact and insult this movie regardless. Twilight’s second installment, New Moon, has hot Vampires and muscly Werewolves, but a severe lack of sexy zombies. Therefore this is an automatic failure in my book. I mean, even Harry Potter has zombie-like monsters in it! Instead, this movie just has emo kids complaining about how nothing really mattress. Here’s my woefully uninformed New Moon Review, for your pleasure and satisfaction:
Next week I may do a review of a random youtube video, or I may just do the same thing I do every week. Who knows? I’m c-c-c-crayzeee!!!
L-L-L-later erebody,
Daniel
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IMHO, those teen wolves are kind of fat, so people do in fact look like that when they’re teenagers, namely Bob McHugh. I actually saw the line of people waiting to get tickets to this movie when I went to see Men Who Stare at Goats. Well, at least I assume it was the line for this movie. Either that or it was some weird angsty teenage girl gang with a fetish for single files.
Das weird, because New Moon isn’t out yet. They must have REALLY wanted to get in if they’re hanging out more than 72 hours early. Also, I’m sorry you had to go see Men Who Stare at Goats. I’ve heard it was thoroughly disappointing.