Shirtless men provide cinematic quality.

You have entered the Twilight Zone. Beyond this world, sucky movies are shown. Speaking of Rush songs, I think I may have subconsciously quoted some of their lyrics in this review. So, the people I know who are Twilight fans even have to clarify that they “know it’s bad,” but like it anyway. Therefore, I feel obligated to ignore this fact and insult this movie regardless. Twilight’s second installment, New Moon, has hot Vampires and muscly Werewolves, but a severe lack of sexy zombies. Therefore this is an automatic failure in my book. I mean, even Harry Potter has zombie-like monsters in it! Instead, this movie just has emo kids complaining about how nothing really mattress. Here’s my woefully uninformed New Moon Review, for your pleasure and satisfaction.

Later erebody,

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