His head a-splode

Dammit Saw, why can’t you just die in peace? Thank God this is the last hurrah for the Saw series because I’m already getting pretty tired of this Saw 3d and Jackass 3D and whatever kinda risky business these marketing executives keep coming up with (maybe a Risky Business 3D? Now THERE’S something I’d pay to see).

This latest feature was advertised the way you’d expect Disney to try roping you into booking an expensive vacation to see MGM studios. Literally, some giant monster reaches out of the screen to pick up a young maiden, and all the people wearing 3D glasses flinch because it’s soooooo scary. They’re either seriously overreacting or seriously underreacting. If it’s just a god damn 3D effect, then get over it unpaid actors in the audience, you’re not five years old. If it’s really a god damn monster coming out of the screen to grab a young maiden, well then Jesus Christ why would anyone just sit there and flinch? Get the hell outta there! That’s why extras always die in disaster movies. It’s about emergency preparedness.

Anyway, don’t check out Saw 3D, but do check out my video review up there. It’s a delightful Halloween treat that’s sure to hit you right in the Goooolish Grapes.

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